Masturbate for peace!

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Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman
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#1 Masturbate for peace!

Post by Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman »

Tired with war, bombing, and terrorism? Why we should spread hate towards each other while we can promote love and peace, starting by loving yourself.
The Power of Masturbation

There's no greater antidote for war than love. Feelings of hatred and distrust form the necessary basis of armed confrontation. Replace those negative feelings with love and you're halfway towards resolution of any conflict.

However, any real love must start from within. You can't love others without loving yourself first. And, of course, masturbation is the greatest expression of self-love. So it's natural that we, the citizens of the world, are joining together to masturbate for peace.


As we begin with this act of self-love, we encourage others to do the same, to take pleasure in life and to share masturbation's positive energy with a world in need.

Peace Petitions and Poetry:



pull down your zip and throw out your trout,
using thine mit thrash it about,
love your root with vicious precision,
to empty your sack must be your mission.

if you cant love yourself you cant love another,
so grasp your womb weasel and think of your lover,
pound it with force and pound it with speed,
pound it for peace that's what the world needs. - Knuckle Shuffler

I will sustain my masturbation campaign until my weapon of mass destruction has been completely disarmed. Sid, Derby, England

The sin of War and the sin of Onan, what a choice is this?
I will definitely sit at home while squirting creamy piss!
My girlfriend's ready and waiting, she will tweak her nub
while I will fire peace torpedoes from my fleshy sub.
Bombs now fall upon Iraq, Bush and Blair have done it.
To stop them I will Bomb my Bird, upon her right tit.
I am sore from coming to much but I'll still follow through
To save the world from death and pain we must all shed our goo - Marlowe

They say that we must stand together,
Stand together for a war,
But I choose to sit,
Sit with some tissues on my bathroom floor. - George, ON, Canada

I intend to break our dependence on foreign oil by recharging my vibrator's battery from environmentally-friendly renewable energy sources and lubricating it with non-petroleum water based products before allowing it to slide deep inside me. - Ontario, Canada

I plan to masturbate for peace while looking at Internet porn of liberty, stroking my penis of equality until it sprays the semen of tolerance into the sock of pacifism. - Mike, Utah

I will masturbate with a flashlight, to illuminate the possibilities of a world without war. - Errin, Austin, Texas
The Sick, Twisted Fuck | Sap #2 of the Bitter Trio | Knight of the e-mail | Evil Liberal Conspirator | Esoteric Order of Dagon | Weird TGODer

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:welcome :arrow: :sheepfucker: :thumbsup

So be it. If saying "NO" means being alone, then to hell with love, with romance, with marriage, and all the shit life keeps pumping at me. I'll walk alone, but with freedom and a healed pride.

NEVER buy a LiteOn CD/DVD Writer. Ever.
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frigidmagi
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#2

Post by frigidmagi »

... You got to be kidding me.
"it takes two sides to end a war but only one to start one. And those who do not have swords may still die upon them." Tolken
Robert Walper
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#3

Post by Robert Walper »

I'd give them the finger, but they'd probably like that. I'd tell them to get a grip, but I'm sure they got that already too.
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velvety_kitten
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#4

Post by velvety_kitten »

*blinks*

I just don't know what to say to all that, other than, hey give the women some equal billing *grins*
Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman
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#5

Post by Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman »

Robert Walper wrote:I'd give them the finger, but they'd probably like that. I'd tell them to get a grip, but I'm sure they got that already too.
FUQ!!!
The Sick, Twisted Fuck | Sap #2 of the Bitter Trio | Knight of the e-mail | Evil Liberal Conspirator | Esoteric Order of Dagon | Weird TGODer

Share your free D&D character here.

:welcome :arrow: :sheepfucker: :thumbsup

So be it. If saying "NO" means being alone, then to hell with love, with romance, with marriage, and all the shit life keeps pumping at me. I'll walk alone, but with freedom and a healed pride.

NEVER buy a LiteOn CD/DVD Writer. Ever.
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Gandalf
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#6

Post by Gandalf »

Where's my Nobel Peace prize dammit?!
"Your personal motto is a self serving piece of wankery spouted by a insane egomanic?" -Frigidmagi

DIE YOU SKINNY FUCK -
B4UTRUST
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