TGOD - Ra Goes On A Killing Spree

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:14 pm

I'm bored.

*As it turned out, Ra had a new toy. A new ship, of course. But this ship was unlike anything Goa'uld technology, or even that of the Ancients, could come up with; this monster, the Quark-class "light picket ship", massed about as much as a Tel'tak cargo ship. But the technology inside was far more than met the eye.*

"What's this button do, I wonder?"

*Pushing a button, power builds up inside the tiny ship. Suddenly, its wings erupt with massive beams of energy. A Goa'uld world the ship orbited seconds earlier is now nothing more than a rapidly expanding cloud of dust. Ra can't help but laugh.*

"Well, well, I like this thing already."

*Ra then jumps the ship, quickly hitting Ludicrus Speed*

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:18 pm

Since you have got an ungodly powerful vessel...

*appears out of nowhere, instantly... accidentally turning everything nearby into flowers*

Ace Pace · Post by **Ace Pace** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:50 pm

"MOVE you slow peice of shit, I hope I can actully find your core and rip it out!"

Ace kicked the rusty pile of bolts and felt the ship twitch.

"Ah, got you good? Good, now move it!

With that, the Galaxy moved, leaving behind the system thrown out of alignment. As it moved, stars were drawn to its mass, disturbing dozens of system as it slowly cruised.

Beep.beep.Beep.beep.Beep.beep.Beep.Beep.BEep.BEEp.BEEP

"what now? If you tell me you need me to walk 5370 kilometers and find another burned sensor diode I will not only crash this ship into a blackhole, I'll let the blackhole win!"

"I'm sorry captain, but there appears to be a problem with reality, we are orbiting an planet that you visited three weeks ago. sir, its full of flowers"

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:56 pm

Sorry, my fault... or rather... the Heart of Gold's fault.

Ah well, full normality will be returning soon... I hope... *pulls another flower out of hair...*

Dartzap · Post by **Dartzap** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 1:45 pm

Something like whale song can heared, high pitched it last a few secounds before ship the size of telephone box gradually becomes vsiable

'This is WarTARDIS Alpha-Omega, prepare to surrender or prepare to never have been born'

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 1:58 pm

*turns to Dartzap* I'll surrender if you have tea.

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:03 pm

*ignores WarTARDIS, laughing behind his anti-temporal shielding*

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:41 pm

*Activates Infinite Improbability... turning the Anti-Temporal shielding into a Temporal Enhancer*

Yes, it's Infinitely Improbable that it would spontaneously happen, that's the entire POINT!

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:45 pm

*reverses shields, ending the attack of pathetically obsolete technology*

"Nice try."

*considers vaping the ship, decides to vape a nearby star instead*

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH, SHINY!"

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:52 pm

*reverses shields, ending the attack of pathetically obsolete technology*

The Infinite Improbability Drive, which allows instantaneous travel from one end of the universe to the other, is pathetically obsolete?! What the FUCK do you have?

This is the Heart of Gold, it's technically Whoverse technology (as Arthur Dent was considered a real person in Doctor Who) now damnit... *turns Ra's vessel into a flowerpot*

Ace Pace · Post by **Ace Pace** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:54 pm

"This is Ship AI emergency broadcast: We are detecting minor changes in the space time fabric, shall we turn to avoid?"

"No, move in, ship Space time to US time!"

The Galaxy slowly turned, shifting planets towards it, twisting time around it, its giant engines sucked up entire astroid belts and spewed out a radioactive mix of heavy elements as it pondered towards the battleground.

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:57 pm

*shields reflect attack, turning the Heart of Gold into a flowerpot*

"*I* have a ship so advanced that it makes the XELEE cower in terror. The picket ship of a civilization from another universe that tore itself apart aeons ago, spanning untold thousands of galaxies."

"*I* am the ultimate power in this galaxy. *I* cannot be stopped. And I shall make an example of the lesser Goa'uld, the Jaffa scum, and those... interlopers that came recently.

*Ra's ship zooms in toward an Ori fleet, firing wildly; the bad imitations of Bentusi tradeships are vaporized with one hit, their shields offering no resistance whatsoever*

It's from some super-duper wank sci-fi project I once mused over. And yes, they are beyond the Xelee, Timelords, and even the Heart of Gold in sheer power. Sorry.

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:03 pm

Okay... if that's how it shall be.

*unleashes a Holy Imperium Battlecruiser, a 400m long vessel designed to look badass.*

Xeelee beater?

How about Holy British Imperium beater?! Eh?

*attacks Ra's ship with seventy-three forms of energy, across five timelines, two mirror universes, and the total amount of energy is infinity.. cubed*

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:04 pm

*soon, a small flash of light appears in Jaffa space; Ha'tak vessels move in to attack, but are suddenly vaporized as the near fighter-sized vessel moves in, firing off hideous bolts of energy as it weaves its way past enemy vessels; the planet they were protecting is hit by a massive beam, and soon is consumed in a blast of flame and dust*

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAH, THE POWAR!!!"

"Shall I set course for Borg space, sir?" the ship's computer asks.

"Too boring. Go to... The Pegasus Galaxy."

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:07 pm

*repels attacks, but is shaken*

"A noteworthy attack registered on the shields, m'lord."

"OOOH, A *REAL* OPPONENT!"

"Quite unimpressively... large... ships however."

"Indeed... but at least now I'll have someone to PLAY with!"

*goes into apeshit-dogfighting maneuvers, firing wildly*

"Hit the Obtuse Parameter Matrix! Fuck, I sound like a GEEK."

*the ship suddenly appears in 20E100000 places at once, as the engines warp the space-time continuum like a piece of rubber*

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:12 pm

*stays in location... and all weaponfire phases through the ship*

Wow, that ship's almost as fast as we are... Activate the Reality-Arseraper... and make me a cup of tea... I'm getting bored.

*Ra's ship is forced into a state of (relative) normality*

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:20 pm

"Ah, I sense the pilot believes you are going too slow. Silly snake and your pathetic piloting skills."

"YOU think I'm going too slow?! HERETIC!"

"Hush, or I'll pull this thing over."

*ship moves so fast as to rip apart a planet on the other side of the system*

"He wants to twist reality, does he?"

~"Anything you can do I can do bett-er,
I can do any-thing bett-er than you!~

*destroys entire star cluster with drive overload, twisting multiple dimension and cackling madly*

"Alright flyboy, that's enough."

"GALADRIEL?!"

"Yes, I am returned. I see that you didn't decide to work for the betterment of all races, but to instead go insane. How... typical."

"But-"

*the Elf raises a hand*

"But you have gotten this thing for a purpose, I suspect?"

"To defend against another Guardian incursion, yes, oh yes!"

"Well then, you should listen. Transport this ship to another universe, and I shall tell you. Use encoded jumping, so that you can get there without your... friend... knowing where you went."

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:26 pm

"So what are they doing now?" Narsil wonders to himself, sipping his perfect cup of tea, "Ensign, activate the Technobabblator... and broadcast it across all channels, with any luck; they'll pick it up and they will surrender to us."

As the technobabblator activates, the sound of Data's voice is heard saying; "You must couple the tachyon matrix to the ion core of the..."

"Silence the speakers damnit!" Narsil yells over the technobabble.

"Aye sir."

A few moments pass...

"Any luck?"

"No sir."

"DAMNIT!"

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:34 pm

*Ra's ship is transported into a void universe, where the Elven queen speaks*

"The Guardians were defeated, yes. But now something worse has come."

"How can there be anything WORSE than the GUARDIANS?!"

"Look around you, young one. This very ship, had it been used during the War, would have annihilated the Guardian threat in a fortnight. There are greater powers in this universe than the Empire, the Guardians, or the Ori. Or even the Makers of this ship."

"Who? Gods?"

"Yes, but that was not my point. This... terror... is coming. It is a true plague. And it is coming... for Earth."

Ra can only imagine what the cryptic Elf means.

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:39 pm

"I've got a bad feeling about this," Narsil heard a deep baritone voice interlaced with artificial breathing from over his shoulder, "something is wrong."

"What is it, Vader?" Narsil asked calmly, remaining where he was in the captain's chair, "And what do you expect me to do about it?"

"It is dark, evil," the cyborg stated, "a hunger in the force beyond all others... I fear that even you may be out of your league here."

"Very well," he turned to the sensor's officer, "scan the entire multiverse, look for anything remotely suspiscious."

"Do you know how little that narrows it down?"

"Just do it."

Ra · Post by Ra » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:55 pm

"A plague? What do you mean? Viruses can be stopped."

"Not a plague in the physical sense, but it is something that seems to appear like a pestulance, interfering and subverting. He is an enslaver, and... consumes those whom he conquers."

"That damnable Archmagus?"

"No, it is something else. You shall see, when the time comes. But for now, we must make our way to Earth."

"EARTH?! I thought you couldn't go there?"

"I have been allowed to come, because of the dire need. You must go to the largest city on the North American continent. There, will your answers be found."

"Why can't we just use this ship, and blow this threat up?"

"Because he would laugh at such an attempt, so great is his power. I will give you all the knowledge you need, in time. Now, we must set off."

Elheru Aran · Post by **Elheru Aran** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:58 pm

--Props feet up on the coffee table, clicks remote--

Isn't there anything better on, dammit! --Clicks and changes channels, sending the one about the mewling little wannabe with the rather badly written ship into oblivion--

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:04 pm

Narsil and Vader appear in the same room as Elheru. Narsil reveals himself to be... well... rather strange, an elf-like being with the typical pointed ears, slender features, and, oddly enough, the wings of a dragonfly. "Well hello there, Mister Aran."

"I find your lack of faith disturbing, Aran," Vader says calmly. The sudden snap-hiss and hum of Vader's lightsabre ends Elheru's life within a few mere moments.

Narsil raises a hand and speaks a few syllables, causing Elheru's remains to be disintegrated, and then both of them vanish, their work complete.

Elheru Aran · Post by **Elheru Aran** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:49 pm

--Shrugs-- A fascinating out-of-body experience there. --picks tooth with formerly-wielded-by-Vader-lightsabre, as contemplates the sphere of Narsil's existence; shrugs, turns his hand over, and lets it drop. It shatters upon the plane of infinity; the Aran turns and wanders the multiverse, and dwindles to a speck beyond gods' comprehension as he steps outside.--

Narsil · Post by **Narsil** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:52 pm

OOC: Don't you dare call me on wank again, El. And fuck off with hijacking the TGOD you git.

LibriumArcana.Games

TGOD - Ra Goes On A Killing Spree

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