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It is time...

Once more, I come unto you all to argue in favor or against the awards of the year for filmmaking at the 2015 Academy Awards. Let's hear it for...

General Havoc's Oscar Liveblog, VOLUME THREE!!!

Let's do this:

General notes:

(Is it me, or does Lady Gaga look rather like someone just ripped the curtains off the wall, strung them up with christmas lights, gave her a pair of dish gloves, and sent her into the red carpet?)

(Lots of Double-sided tape on display tonight)

(Awful joke about Witherspoon's name)

(How often are you really going to be up there? Ignore the hurry up music! Make them summon the cops!)

("DARKNESS! NO PARENTS!")

(The guy from The Phone Call is out of his mind.)

(The woman from Doc Shorts brings up her son's suicide and the "hurry up" music dies instantly. Nice job.)

(David Oyelowo looks like a Bellhop in that getup. And I do hope we've seen the end of Annie remakes.)

(Tim McGraw stinks up the performance. Extremely sharp. >.<)

("Acting is a noble profession", says the man as he gives Ben a thrill.)

("Two weeks ago, we held the science and technical awards in another theater. But those people are not invited here because they're nerds.")

("Four women, and in accordance with California State Law, Meryl Streep." Niiiiiiice.)

(Oh god, here goes Patricia... Is that why she got the award?)

(The Rock is at the Oscars. My life is complete.)

(I... did not know that Lady Gaga could sing like that.)



Running Score:
Accurate Predictions by the genius-in-residence: 7
Pushes: 12
Criminal Travesties Against Nature and God: 5

Best Supporting Actor:
Who should have won: Edward Norton. Admittedly, I didn't see Whiplash and I love J.K. Simmons. But among the movies I saw, Norton was the biggest surprise of them all.
Who actually won: J.K. Simmons. Whiplash gets it! Figures. Well I love J.K. Simmons, and people whose opinions I respect thought this film was amazing. No complaints.

Best Costume Design:
Who should have won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. Wes Anderson dresses his actors the way he dresses his sets: Perfectly.
Who actually won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. Damn right. Wes Anderson never managed anything this amazing before, and that's saying quite a bit.

Best Hairstyling/Makeup:
Who should have won: Guardians of the Galaxy. Two of the main cast were painted different colors and one was a racoon. And even besides that, this much Groot-Grow needs to be rewarded.
Who actually won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. I can't complain overmuch here given the previous win. And Anderson's film did deserve recognition in this category.

Best Foreign Language Film:
Who should have won: Not a clue. That said, ever since Intouchables was not even nominated in 2012, I've become highly suspicious of this category.
Who actually won: Ida. From Poland. Never heard of it. I really like the guy's acceptance speech though.

Best Short Film:
Who should have won: The Phone Call. Best of a weak field, this year.
Who actually won: The Phone Call! AHA! Oscars get it right for once! I was terrified they were going to pick that Israeli snore-fest.

Best Documentary Short Subject:
Who should have won: No idea. I didn't catch the docs this year, let alone the short ones.
Who actually won: Crisis Hotline, Veterans Press 1. Something tells me we have a theme going on here...

Best Sound Mixing:
Who should have won: Birdman. The weird, jazz-atonal sounds of this film actually worked, which is a minor miracle in and of itself.
Who actually won: Whiplash. Figures a film about music would win this. Didn't see it. No objection.

Best Sound Editing:
Who should have won: Birdman. See above. Frankly, anyone but Interstellar would do for this one.
Who actually won: American Sniper. NO. I saw this thing at last, and its sound was awful. Gunshots sounded like people making mouth-noises on a mike. Terrible, terrible pick.

Best Supporting Actress:
Who should have won: Kiera Knightly. Tough one, I admit, but I'll give the nod to Knightly for making an actual character out of what I assumed would be a token role.
Who actually won: Patricia Arquette. You know, I just didn't think she was that good in this movie, not at all. I don't get it, but I suspect this is a precursor for what's to come for Boyhood.

Best Visual Effects:
Who should have won: Guardians of the Galaxy. The traditional award for "Best movie that was actually fun to watch" should go to a movie that was actually fun.
Who actually won: Interstellar. ADAMANTIUM RAAAAAAAAAGE! NONONONONONONONONONONO, How the fuck did you mess this up. ANY OTHER FILM WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER SELECTION YOU DUMBASSES!!!

Best Animated Short:
Who should have won: Feast. Disney does it again, those rotten assholes.
Who actually won: Feast. Never bet against Disney. At least the academy got this much right.

Best Animated Feature:
Who should have won: The Lego Movie. No I don't care that it wasn't nominated. This non-selection was a travesty that should be punished with riots and torch-wielding mobs.
Who actually won: Big Hero 6. ... yeah... okay... fine. I can't complain about this. STILL SHOULD HAVE BEEN LEGO MOVIE. But... yeah.

Best Production Design:
Who should have won: Interstellar. The one thing that wasn't wrong with this film.
Who actually won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. I have no objections. Interstellar has won enough.

Best Cinematography:
Who should have won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. It's a real close tossup in my mind between this and Birdman, but I'll give a slight edge to Anderson's finest cinematographic work.
Who actually won: Birdman. I'm claiming this one! It's a worthy award given for one of the most originally-shot films all year.

Best Editing:
Who should have won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. It really ought to be Birdman here, but I'll take what the nominators gave me.
Who actually won: Whiplash. This thing's cleaning up. I may have to go see it.

Best Documentary Feature:
Who should have won: Yet again, no idea. I usually catch a doc or two throughout the year, but just didn't manage to get to one this time.
Who actually won: Citizen Four. Oh goody. More publicity for Edward Snowden. The man who flees in the desperate hope that someone will pursue.

Best Original Song:
Who should have won: Everything is Awesome. Earwormy to the extreme and a whole hell of a lot of fun. If I can't honor Lego Movie anywhere else, I will have it honored here.
Who actually won: Glory. ... yeah alright. This song grew on me, I have to admit. And I remain a sucker for Electro-Gospel. Plus Common gave a pretty damn good speech.

Best Original Score:
Who should have won: Interstellar. I actually really liked Hans Zimmer's work on this one.
Who actually won: The Grand Budapest Hotel. I'm not gonna object to this one. Interstellar, as I mentioned, has won enough for my taste. And I did love the soundtrack here.

Best Original Screenplay:
Who should have won: Birdman. One of the most original concepts I saw last year, more than deserving.
Who actually won: Birdman. Excellent! What a script this was, with such wit and inventiveness!

Best Adapted Screenplay:
Who should have won: Anything but The Imitation Game: A simplistic script that falls apart under the most minute scrutiny. I didn't see the others, so give it to one of them.
Who actually won: The Imitation Game. Goddammit, people. YOU HAD ONE JOB. This script collapses when you think about it for five minutes.

Best Director:
Who should have won: Alejandro González Iñárritu. Wouldn't be stunned to see Anderson pull this off, but I've gotta give credit where it's due.
Who actually won: Alejandro González Iñárritu. Excellent work! I thought he deserved it head and shoulders above all others except maybe Anderson. And apparently he wore Michael Keaton's lucky underwear. Thanks for sharing.

Best Actor:
Who should have won: Michael Keaton. Close call between him and Cumberbatch, but Keaton's return to prominence should be rewarded, given the result.
Who actually won: Eddie Redmayne. Whoa... where did that come from? I didn't think he stood a prayer. I didn't see this one, so I can't really complain though.

Best Actress:
Who should have won: Rosamund Pike. I may have hated the movie, but Pike was on a completely different level for this one.
Who actually won: Julianne Moore. Er... no. I mean I didn't see the movie, so I can't really speculate. But no. I've never thought Julianne Moore that good of an actress. I won't call this a terrible choice sight-unseen, but... no.

Best Picture:
Who should have won: Birdman. I know I gave Grand Budapest a higher score, but looking back, I was more impressed by Birdman than by any other film. My vote goes to the return of Michael Keaton.
Who actually won: Birdman! And in the end, the Academy gets it right. Birman was, in retrospect, the best movie of the ones nominated. Well done, voters. You got it right.

Jack Black interupts the intro song.

Jack Black can be relied upon for raving insanity.

The Lego Movie's "Everything Is Awesome" was highly amusing. Even had Batman Dancing.

"Not gonna Miss You" from the Glen Campbell Story will win. It's got a CAUSE behind it (Alzheimers), and it's a tear-jerker.

LadyTevar wrote:"Not gonna Miss You" from the Glen Campbell Story will win. It's got a CAUSE behind it (Alzheimers), and it's a tear-jerker.

Probably.

The In Memorium was done via water-colors, with the actors deplicted younger, in their best-known roles. I liked it. Havoc prefers a clip-show.

Of all the things I thought LadyGaga would be doing, I did not expect her to do the tribute to 50ys of "Sound of Music".

My god, it was glorious. If they ever redo the movie, she should take the lead. And then, as Lady Gaga was getting a standing ovation, Julie Andrews walked out and said in her ear "That was fantastic".

LadyTevar wrote:Of all the things I thought LadyGaga would be doing, I did not expect her to do the tribute to 50ys of "Sound of Music".

My god, it was glorious. If they ever redo the movie, she should take the lead. And then, as Lady Gaga was getting a standing ovation, Julie Andrews walked out and said in her ear "That was fantastic".

I didn't know she could do that...

General Havoc wrote:

LadyTevar wrote:Of all the things I thought LadyGaga would be doing, I did not expect her to do the tribute to 50ys of "Sound of Music".

My god, it was glorious. If they ever redo the movie, she should take the lead. And then, as Lady Gaga was getting a standing ovation, Julie Andrews walked out and said in her ear "That was fantastic".

I didn't know she could do that...

Why couldn't she? She is a classically trained musician.

I'm not suprised Remayne won. After all, it was very difficult playing Hawkins, especially as the disease progressed, and he began having to lose control of his body, and most expecially his voice. An actor who has so little to work with, and yet gives such a powerful performance without use of voice, facial muscles, etc, deserved the Oscar

Comrade Tortoise wrote:

General Havoc wrote:

LadyTevar wrote:Of all the things I thought LadyGaga would be doing, I did not expect her to do the tribute to 50ys of "Sound of Music".

My god, it was glorious. If they ever redo the movie, she should take the lead. And then, as Lady Gaga was getting a standing ovation, Julie Andrews walked out and said in her ear "That was fantastic".

I didn't know she could do that...

Why couldn't she? She is a classically trained musician.

Yes she is... but let's be honest, most folks were expecting some pop-music wildness from her, not a 4-Octave "Hills are Alive" that left chills down your back

LadyTevar wrote:I'm not suprised Remayne won. After all, it was very difficult playing Hawkins, especially as the disease progressed, and he began having to lose control of his body, and most expecially his voice. An actor who has so little to work with, and yet gives such a powerful performance without use of voice, facial muscles, etc, deserved the Oscar

Having not seen the film, I can only speculate, but I've always thought Michael Keeton was a tremendously underrated actor, and that he remains one here. Still, no complaints.

Comrade Tortoise wrote:

General Havoc wrote:

LadyTevar wrote:Of all the things I thought LadyGaga would be doing, I did not expect her to do the tribute to 50ys of "Sound of Music".

My god, it was glorious. If they ever redo the movie, she should take the lead. And then, as Lady Gaga was getting a standing ovation, Julie Andrews walked out and said in her ear "That was fantastic".

I didn't know she could do that...

Why couldn't she? She is a classically trained musician.

Half the pop stars currently active claim to be "classically-trained musicians". I have never heard Lady Gaga deliver a performance like that, and even Julie Andrews herself looked blown away.

It's not unlikely that half the pop stars currently active actually are classically trained musicians. For starters the claim isn't exactly regulated by some agency, so there's a lot of leeway as to what exactly you can mean by that phrase without lying. More importantly though, just because you're trained by old school pros doesn't mean you're any good. It was actually a plot point in Citizen Kane, the best operatic trainers in the business could not make Mrs. Kane sing, but she was nevertheless a classically trained opera singer. Art imitating life right there.

In which case I would question whether "classical" training has any value whatsoever in gauging skill, and consequently any relevance to whether I should be surprised by this performance.

True I suppose, but then I wasn't at all surprised by Lady Gaga's performance, as I always thought she was a really good singer. Here's her ten years ago, showing her immense talent in the pre-Gaga days.

General Havoc wrote: Best Visual Effects:
Who should have won: Guardians of the Galaxy. The traditional award for "Best movie that was actually fun to watch" should go to a movie that was actually fun.
Who actually won: Interstellar. ADAMANTIUM RAAAAAAAAAGE! NONONONONONONONONONONO, How the fuck did you mess this up. ANY OTHER FILM WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER SELECTION YOU DUMBASSES!!!

What, a comic book movie? With an Oscar? What madness is this? Everyone knows comic book movies are for the plebian masses while Interstellar was clearly a sophisticated movie that was far superior in visual effects!

Steve wrote:

General Havoc wrote: Best Visual Effects:
Who should have won: Guardians of the Galaxy. The traditional award for "Best movie that was actually fun to watch" should go to a movie that was actually fun.
Who actually won: Interstellar. ADAMANTIUM RAAAAAAAAAGE! NONONONONONONONONONONO, How the fuck did you mess this up. ANY OTHER FILM WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER SELECTION YOU DUMBASSES!!!

What, a comic book movie? With an Oscar? What madness is this? Everyone knows comic book movies are for the plebian masses while Interstellar was clearly a sophisticated movie that was far superior in visual effects!

Dark Knight won a Supporting Actor nod, and the Best Visual Effects Oscar traditionally goes to big summer blockbusters that would otherwise be ignored. Fuck this pick.

"Dark Knight was a proper artistic movie masquerading as a comic movie, obviously. And clearly Interstellar was so awesome it deserved the Oscar over some stupid comic book movie with a talking racoon."

Oh, don't mind me, just stoking the fires a bit....

I'm not sure The Dark Knight would have gotten a supporting actor nod, deserved as it was, if said actor hadn't up and died.

Lys wrote:I'm not sure The Dark Knight would have gotten a supporting actor nod, deserved as it was, if said actor hadn't up and died.

Probably not, but it got one anyway. And fuck Interstellar.

Havoc, this is just for you:

"I don't really feel good that an animated children's movie beat such a movie like Interstellar at the domestic box office. I wonder what that says about us as Americans. Globally, Interstellar dominated, thankfully. I don't have anything against animated movies. They are witty and very entertaining. I just wonder why Interstellar came in second to a movie like that." -Studio2770

"I wonder the exact same thing too!! But hey, don't be too surprised. If Avengers (I still really love) can rake in bigger $$$ ahead of enlightening pieces of art like this, then don't be too shocked by big hero 6. It's very telling isn't it?" -92kwame

"Because kids... I was watching interstellar and a family of kids was sitting next to me. Once the movie was over I heard one of them go "finally that was so boring". Sigh kids..." -Prodigious Berserker

"I feel that those who think the film didn't make any points completely missed them. I honestly don't understand how it has a 73% rating on RT :(" -Mmmchutney

"This movie was amazing. Never before has my jaw dropped in a movie that is so interesting, intense, clever, and heartfelt. Seriously 10/10. Never before have I been this hung up on a movie. Seriously, see it." -Chris Do

"this was the greatrest movie of all time in my opinion." -farhanking7861

"Only one other movie for me and that was Inception. " -Bobby D

"If you haven't seen this you haven't lived. Not only was the music amazing, but it was just INCREDIBLE overall" -Joseph Lacy

"This was everything one can ask of a movie. Strong plot and storyline. The father/daughter interaction was epic. The drama far exceeded what I expected in a sci-fi, so I'm giving this 5 stars. Good call, man!" -Sean Jones

"It seems Nolan has put together another masterpiece." -Ryan Goodwin

"What didn't you like? Its genius. I think the majority of people who didn't like it didn't understand it." -Joshua Richards

"Interstellar and Space Odyssey are pretty close and gravity comes third." -Billy

"And that's EXACTLY why Gravity is not as good as Interstellar. Gravity relied way too much on special effects. It had no story and the dialogue was laughable ("tell me about the hairy guy", "I hate space", for example); Interstellar had the effects, but also an amazing story, script, etc." -Justin Balogh

(All dredged up from the sewer that is the YouTube comments section.)

Youtube comments so we already know they're the bottom 20% there.

Do you see why I have trouble taking anyone's "behold the downfall of western civilization" crap seriously? Do you see?! Because it's usually shit like this they're doing.

Feel better about yourself, Lys. You are smarter than every one of those people put together. Of course so is my dog, but still!

Clearly, that people think Interstellar is genius is a sign of the coming downfall of western civilization.