Let's do the grading system real fast.
A+ = There is nothing wrong with this book. It is perfectly written, all the characters are note perfect, the plot is amazing. This is the book that Jesus, Buddah and the Monkey King would write if they got together to write books for us lowly unworthy mortals. Someday I will find this book and then I can rest.
A = Great book, the best of the best that mere mortals can hope to do. Finding these books is a good day.
A- = This book has some minor problems but is a great book that will not fail to entertain.
B+ = Really entertaining and good, but with issues.
B = Really good book, I wish this was the standard.
B- = Better then average, but you could have done better.
C+ = Above average.
C = Average.
C- = A good effort but a number of fuck ups hold it back.
D+ = Please attend a writing class. No don't keep practicing, get to a writing class, you need help.
D = Substandard. Weep for the trees that sarificed their palp in the vain hopes of being part of a good book and were instead made into this.
D- = I NEED AN ADULT! I NEED AN ADULT!
F = NEVER WRITE AGAIN! This book has no redeeming value and the writer has done everything wrong. There is no F+ or F-. Once you get past D- you're just an awful human being.
Touched by an Alien, by Gini Koch.
A man suffers for his mistakes. This is a universal constant that I do not dispute, nor do I really even dislike. That said, attempting to be just and fair shouldn't be a mistake guys! This book was recommended to me by a Barnes and Noble employee, who I found out later, recommended it to me because she remembered seeing me attempt to read Twilight. I say attempt to read because I only got 10 chapters into the book and decided to try something else, anything else to pass the time.
TbA is a sci-fi romance that gets by on massive amounts of pandering to it's reader. We're talking oil tanker amounts here. In this case the main character, one Katherine Katt is a witness to an alien attack and through aggressive action manages to foil it. By killing the poor bastard being controled by an alien parasite with her pen. She is then scooped up by a flying squad of pretty young men in pretty sharp suits and whisked away to fantasy world. There are two sets of aliens here, one a band of parasites who feed on negative emotions and latch onto people experience them. They tend change the body of their host into some sort of raving monster (expect for a single class of super parasite of course) and go on rampages. They can hook up to any mammal, survive the void of space and atmosphereic rentry. They can however be killed with enough firepower or when they first inhabit a host (then you can kill them with a pen, or a butterknife I suppose if you have no writing tools handy).
Opposing them are a bunch of superhuman aliens from Alaph Centauri who all look like supermodels, are super fast (like flash fast) and have two hearts (because of course they couldn't go fast without two hearts, don't you know anything about SCIENCE!!!). Of course two of them fall for Katherine, who must now face the agony of chosing between two really good looking men with superpowers who think she is the most awesome thing since buttered toast was invented.
To be fair, Gini is an equal oppotunity panderer! The girl aliens are all super hot, super smart (we're talking NASA brains here guys), super nice and really want to meet nice human boys who are into science stuff. Yep, that's right, happy cheerleaders who want to bone nerds and then talk about your science project. So... Something for everyone I guess?
Oh there's also this side issue of saving all life on Earth from extinction. Don't worry though Katherine has all the brains we need! Her job in this story is to figure out everything! I mean everything! There is no important problem that she doesn't solve usually within an hour of hearing about it. All while telling us how dull, dumb and average looking she is. This isn't aggravating at all. Additionally some of her solutions make me want to rip out other people's hair. For example, one parasite looks like a slug, so we kill it with salt! EXPECT YOU TOLD ME THE PARASITE HOSTS WERE MAMMALS! MAMMALS DO NOT DIE FROM SALT LIKE SLUGS! Oh this parasite looks like a snake, we'll hypnotize it with rock music! Expect snakes aren't actually hyonotized by music guys, they're following the motion of the music player. Even then, it's not actually a snake because you told me the parasites only inhabit MAMMALS! A SNAKE IS NOT A MAMMAL!
Sorry. Sorry. But yeah, Katherine and her rather simplistic solutions that magically solve everything is a big problem. But don't worry guys, she's not perfect, she can't cook and drinks to much Coke (how is she in such great shape then? Nevermind!) to the point that every character makes jokes about her Coke fetish. That horse is reduced to paste. Now there is smut in this. Smut in and of itself isn't a problem, although it's not what I really want in a book. In this case? The smut is boring. You hear that smut, you're boring. I'm bored. BORED! I ended up skipping ahead. The romance is incredibly unrealistic and frankly rather heavy handed. The aliens such balent wish fulfillment I can't begin to describe it all. That said, the characters are consistent and... Still a better romance then Twilight. I think the big problem here is a demographic mix up. I'm clearly not the person this was written for. That said Frankly I think you can do better for sci-fi romance. I pray to God you can do better for sci-fi romance.
Touched by an Alein gets D+. Avoid this book.
That said, I feel that Gini is owed money by the Coke Cola Corporation. Because after this book? I really wanted a Coke. Clearly she missed her calling as a marketer... Wait, that's Katherine's day job... SON OF A BITCH!
The Pope Who Quit by Jon Sweeney
This is a history book about the first Pope to resign his post.
NO! Not him!
This Guy!
Pope Celestine V, born Pete Morrone, a hermit, founder of a religious order of hermits. Managed to get himself elected Pope by accident in 1294! By writing a letter to the Cardinals to get the lead out and pick a new Pope already...
Be careful what you ask for.
He would serve as Pope for 6 months before resigning. Never once did he step foot in Rome, serving as Pope from Naples the whole time. An act that rocked the Catholic Church to it's very bedrock and would pave the way for Benedict's own resignation. This book discusses the times that produces Pope Celestine V and his early life, the issues the Church was going through and the political times and people who were players in this drama. We get a look at the intense religious feelings and desires of the age, the corruption and failings of the Church and the conflicting desires of the Church's Princes. The conflict within spiritual orders between those who want great rigor in their lives and those who seek liberalization and how this all feeds into this Papacy and it's failure. This book was really interesting and enlightening not just about the very brief Papacy but the events that led up to it. Although there's weak coverage of the aftermath in my opinion.
If you're interested in the Middle Ages, odd stories of history, the Catholic Church or any combination of the last 3, then you're interested in this book.
The Pope Who Quit gets a B+
) and the messenger service that is right up there with the Pony Express. Since I didn't know much about the Persian Empire this was a welcome thing. 
