LibriumArcana.Games

Petrosjko wrote:

Ace Pace wrote: *shoots Petro*

Oh... that... *falls over* Well then. I guess this is the end of me. Hold on, I have a smashing final speech.
Ahem. Now then, I'm going to have to ad lib some changes in for circumstances, you understand...
Ace, my boy, I've loved you like a nephew...
Even if you're a treacherous little backstabbing rat fuck bastard who shot me for no good reason.As such, I urge you to carry on my traditions and principles.Including NOT SHOOTING PEOPLE without good reason. A line that suddenly has a lot more emphasis than when I originally wrote it, due to circumstances.
Anyway, uphold truth and justice whenever you can, defend the holy porn, and spread the goodness of bosoms throughout the land.
And now, I must go, but I go without regrets, for I have lived a full life. I've gone where I wanted to go and done what I wanted to do, and my only regret is that I'm dying in excruciating, miserable pain instead of peacefully in my sleep, DUE TO THE ACTIONS OF A CERTAIN PERSON WHO IS CURRENTLY PRESENT.
And while there was a part of this speech about not carrying regrets and always looking forward instead of behind, I hereby charge you to be burdened with incredible, mind-numbing guilt and grief over what you have done for every goddamned day of your life. So anyway, it's time for me to go, and all I can ask is one final favor... please name one of your children after me. Oh, and make sure my tequila stash is properly distributed at the funeral.

Aaack.Ack.The pain.Oh. I see a tunnel of light.
Oh! Look! It's heaven!My but it's warm! And God is running around poking people with his pitchfork!I bet grandma loves it here!
*dies*

Oh geez, could you call me something more complimentary, like 'my shithead'?

Petro wrote:It's a sad world we live in, when you can't trust a that a Jewish dentist is either Jewish, or a dentist.

Cynical Cat wrote:I've come to transmute water into wine and kick ass. And I'm all out of water.

Maybe, if you pray hard enough, you can find . . . .The J Team (que A-Team music).

The Greatest Comedic Duo Ever wrote:Petrosjko: What class are you? Civvy?
Pcm979: I didn't check.
Pcm979: Gordarmes decided to end it all before he worked out who he was.
Petrosjko: Tragic.
Pcm979: I know.
Pcm979: At least as a Zombie he knows his goal in life.
Petrosjko: And all because his parents wouldn't let him go to cosmotology school so he could fulfill his lifelong ambition of becoming a barber.
Petrosjko: Now, he takes a little off the top as a zombie.
Pcm979: Justice.
Petrosjko: They were the first to go.
Petrosjko: When they mistook his grumbling shuffling through the living room as simply being his normal pre-breakfast behavior.
Pcm979: An understandable mistake, although the chunk missing from his head should have tipped them off that all was not well.
Petrosjko: Yes, but when did they ever really pay attention to him? No, it was always about his older brother, the traveling Viagra salesman.
Pcm979: Damnit, Petro! *Sigh*.

His career was on the rise.
Petrosjko: He traveled from one end of the country to the other with an uplifting message.
Pcm979: Anyone selling a rival brand was up against some stiff competition.
Petrosjko: His greatest talent was his ability to get into the heads of his customers.
Pcm979: A talent that Gordarmes had no hope of duplicating... Until now.
Petrosjko: They asked him to take out the trash. He obliged.
Pcm979: He's taken the motto "Take another stab at it" to heart!

They Strike again, from the darkness of the Interweb! wrote:Petrosjko: I prefer your dogs. They seem more... functional.
Pcm979: They are.
Pcm979: Dachshunds were bred to chase badgers down holes and kill them.
Petrosjko: I know.
Pcm979: Ridgebacks were bred to hunt loins.
Petrosjko: Er.
Petrosjko: *crosses legs*
Petrosjko: You don't say.
Pcm979: Er.
Pcm979:
Pcm979: Lions.

Petrosjko wrote:

B4UTRUST wrote:Josh, you have to remember that I've known about 99% of the people on this board for less then *thinks* 4 or 5 months. I didn't even known Kreshna was muslim.

And when I was stating the surrendering bit I was refering to the US, not to other countries.

Preemptively surendering. *shakes his head* What will the French think of next to advance the nature of warfare? Do they have like a surrender template or something?

We, the French, being of cowardly mind and tiny testicles, hereby duely surrender to you (insert country name) on this day (insert date). We hereby proclaim our devotion, enduring love and loyalty to you the (insert name of people). You will find we have also, as a unified former country now under your leadership, have opted to place our faith in your religion of (insert religion name).

We welcome you as our new and benevolent rulers and we hope you enjoy your new national asset.

Your faithful, loyal and cowardly new servant
-(insert name of current leader of France)

The actual template is a lot more flowery and actually extends over eighteen pages, with long-winded verses on 'your eternal benevolence' and 'obvious superiority' and so on, but yes, that's essentially the gist of it.

It was drafted back in the seventies when a group of Boy Scouts went on a camping trip and the French were caught off-guard by this sudden introduction of obviously hostile troops inside their borders. Their hastily-rendered surrender ceremony was often mocked for its lack of elegance and style, so they formed a committee to insure that it would never happen again.

Robert Walper wrote:My father? He is a wretched scum of villianry, routinely drowning himself in the comfort of alcoholic bevarages while ruthlessly beating innocents. His wit appears at times sharp, induced by the random chemical reactions of his alcohol saturated brain. His evil knows no bounds, his deplorable and vicious mindset thriving on spiraling all others mad or into such degrees of despair and suffering that the only escape route is madness. His obsession for power is only matched by his insatiable hungry and need to destroy anything and everyone possible to obtain it. The darkest demons of man's haunted mind are but mere glimpses of the true dark side of my father, for the darkness he spreads had no end, middle or beginning. It merely exists for it's own sake, and with it's thick putrid grip upon reality defines all other existence and concepts as good and pure.

*notices Petro, waves* Hi dad!

Lord Stormbringer wrote:Something about human rights and animal cruelty and how hard it would be to tell the difference.

Well. Put it this way.

They fought against the Enemies of the Imperium, and laid off the humans for the duration. They defended the pylons of Cadia alongside the Imperial Guard, and destroyed at least one of the Blackstone Fortresses Abaddon was using to attack humanity.

We are your friends...

...cuddle us...

Ra wrote:It's my way of expressing my fanboyishness.

Lindar wrote:*curous, pokes* how does one know if one is a fanperson?

Dartzap wrote:A fanperson has an electric fan attached to their heads, and when it's hot, and their idol goes past, they try and fan them.