Favorite quotations

Josh · Post by **Josh** » Sat Jul 02, 2005 9:11 pm

Speaking of board quotes, I'll self-FUQ myself for this one on another board.

"I bet Reality got the house and the car during the divorce, and he's still bitter."

The Morrigan · Post by **The Morrigan** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:09 am

Yet another one from Terry Pratchett:

There had never been an official coronation in Ankh Morpork[...]. The old kings had managed quite well with something along the lines of: 'We hath got the crown, i'faith, and we will kill any whoreson who tries to take it away, by the Lord Harry.'
From Guards! Guards

The World is a bad joke created by the Almighty on an off day.
Liam Devlin in The Eagle Has Landed (I think)

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. [..] and when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
Brick Top in Snatch

The Grim Squeaker · Post by **The Grim Squeaker** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:37 am

Outside of a dog a book is a manÃƒâ€šÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s best friend, but inside a dog it's too dark too read.

By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes

Veni, Vidi, Vici. - I came, I saw, I conquered

Man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so muchÃƒâ€šÃ¢â‚¬â€

The Morrigan · Post by **The Morrigan** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:55 am

[quote="Dark lord of the megas"]Outside of a dog a book is a manÃƒâ€šÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s best friend, but inside a dog it's too dark too read.

By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes

Veni, Vidi, Vici. - I came, I saw, I conquered

Man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so muchÃƒâ€šÃ¢â‚¬â€

Ace Pace · Post by **Ace Pace** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:10 am

The Morrigan wrote:
Dark lord of the megas wrote:Outside of a dog a book is a man’s best friend, but inside a dog it's too dark too read.

By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes

Veni, Vidi, Vici. - I came, I saw, I conquered

Man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars—while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in water having a good time. But the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man for precisely the same reasons
Best dolphin quote ever :luv: :D
!

:?

The Grim Squeaker · Post by **The Grim Squeaker** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 5:50 am

You do know that the last sentence was a comment, not a quote right?

Dartzap · Post by **Dartzap** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 12:19 pm

Addams Family Values:

Debbie(about Gomez) 'What a lady killer'

Gomez 'Aquitted'

Gomez about his new son ' He has my fathers eyes'

Morticia 'Take those out of there at once..'

Batman · Post by **Batman** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 12:42 pm

Topper: I want to meet your parent, pet your dog...
Ramada: My parents are dead, Topper. My dog ate them.

'Oops!' Shannon Foraker

During a D&D board game session, the halfling opens a chest.
First item out, useless sword.
Second item out, useless bow.
Third item out, ambush.
Fellow player, after having barely beaten off the ambush, deadpan:
"We should have taken the bow".

My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.
-Maximus, Gladiator

I think this thread is going to be around for a while
:D

The Grim Squeaker · Post by **The Grim Squeaker** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 1:06 pm

The house divided upon itself cannot stand.
A. Lincoln

To be or not to be, that is the question
Hamlet

Better a witty fool than a foolish wit
Shakespheare

Josh · Post by **Josh** » Fri Jul 29, 2005 3:43 am

Revival!

"Yeah, you start believing in the peace on Earth goodwill stuff, there's no telling how messed up you're gonna get."

Ham Tyler, V.

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Fri Jul 29, 2005 8:17 am

In Difficult Ground, press on;
In Encircled Ground, devise stratagems;
In Death Ground, Fight.
Sun Tzu, Art of War, 400 BC

# "All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us...they can't get away this time."
Chesty Puller, USMC, Korean War.

"We've been looking for the enemy for several days now, we've finally found them. We're surrounded. That simplifies our problem of getting to these people and killing them."
Also Chesty Puller, USMC, Korean War

They told our perimeter guard to open up or we'll blow you away and then they looked up and saw the Marines on the roof with these really big guns and they said in Somali, 'Igaralli ahow,' which means, 'Excuse me, I didn't mean it, my mistake.'"
- Karen Aguilar, U.S. Embassy, Mogadishu, Somalia, 1991

a young Marine was being interviewed, and he was asked: "What is the Marine Corps' mission in Iraq?"
He replied: "It is to beat the Army to Baghdad, sir."

"The American Marines are terribly reckless fellows...they would make very good storm troopers."
- Unidentified German officer at Belleau Wood

"Do not attack the First Marine Division. Leave the yellowlegs alone. Strike the American Army."
- Orders given to Communist troops in the Korean War; shortly afterward, the Marines were ordered to not wear their khaki leggings to keep the enemy from immediately fleeing

"Marines never die! They just go to hell and regroup."
Unknown.

Josh · Post by **Josh** » Fri Jul 29, 2005 12:04 pm

Geez FM, you left out some quintessential Puller. But tracking some of it down also gave me some other real prizes.

"Don't forget that you're First Marines! Not all the Communists in hell can overrun you!"

"They are a damn site better than the U.S. Army. At least we know that they will be there in the morning."
- Lewis B. "Chesty" Puller when a journalist asked him about being surrounded by 22 enemy divisions

"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography."
- Ambrose Bierce

"Hard pressed on my right; my left is in retreat. My center is yielding. Impossible to maneuver. Situation excellent. I am attacking."
- General Ferdinand Foch

"When you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pussy."
- attributed to General Tommy Franks or Marine General James Mattis

"My rule is: If you meet the weakest vessel, attack; if it is a vessel equal to yours, attack; and if it is stronger than yours, also attackÃƒâ€šÃ¢â‚¬Â¦"
- Admiral Stepan O. Makarov

"The Libyan army is capable of destroying America and breaking its nose."
- Muammar Qaddafi

The Morrigan · Post by **The Morrigan** » Sat Jul 30, 2005 7:27 pm

Little Vicky: I'm sorry, Lisa, but giving everyone an equal part when they are clearly not equal is called what again, class?

Children: Communism!

The Simpsons

Professor Lupin: Looking a bit ragged Sirius? Finally, the flesh reflects the madness within.
Sirius Black: Well, you'd know all about the madness within, wouldn't you Remus?

From The Prisoner of Azkaban (the film)

The Morrigan · Post by **The Morrigan** » Sun Aug 07, 2005 7:33 pm

All great truths begin as blasphemies. - George Bernard Shaw

ImpishAngel · Post by **ImpishAngel** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 3:37 pm

"Wrong Brother, you hatefull bitch"
Kill Bill 2

"Ah, but you HAVE heard of me"
Jack Sparrow- Pirates of the Carribean

"I will show you, the greatest nightmare"
Mortal Combat-Deadly Alliance

"Ah, not to bright are you?"
"No."
"Perfect."
The Italian Job

ImpishAngel · Post by **ImpishAngel** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 3:44 pm

Forgot one-

"But why is the rum gone?!?"
Jack Sparrow-Pirates of the Carribean

Gandalf · Post by **Gandalf** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 4:31 pm

"I overreacted" Bill.

This next quote has become a personal motto:

"A true victory is to make your enemy see they were wrong to oppose you in the first place. To force them to acknoledge your greatness." Gul Dukat.

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 4:50 pm

Your personal motto is a self serving piece of wankery spouted by a insane egomanic?

Well in that spirit I give you this.

"A true victory is to make your enemy see they were wrong to oppose you in the first place. To force them to acknoledge your greatness." Gul Dukat.

"And then you kill them?" Weyoun

Post by **Dark Silver** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 4:53 pm

I think I like Weyoun's addition to that motto myself...

Gandalf · Post by **Gandalf** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 5:16 pm

frigidmagi wrote:Your personal motto is a self serving piece of wankery spouted by a insane egomanic?

... Yes.

Can I sig that?

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Tue Aug 09, 2005 12:40 am

Knock yourself out.

Quoting my little brother.

"I caught this man deserting, so I've ripped out his guts and made him the new latrine. Your orders are whenever you take a crap on this rotting corspe of a coward is to look him in the eye and say, 'Pussy!'"

I have never been so proud

Josh · Post by **Josh** » Tue Aug 09, 2005 6:47 pm

"Council of Leaders, Dance Us Into Death"

Spraypainted on the wall of the Fort Perryn armory, during the ongoing zombie massacre.

Josh · Post by **Josh** » Tue Aug 09, 2005 7:52 pm

"I, for one, welcome our new zombie overlords." Cannon Fodder McDead, the Fort Perryn massacre.

The Morrigan · Post by **The Morrigan** » Tue Aug 09, 2005 8:18 pm

Petrosjko wrote:"I, for one, welcome our new zombie overlords." Cannon Fodder McDead, the Fort Perryn massacre.

That sounds really familiar for some reason.

Stofsk · Post by **Stofsk** » Tue Aug 09, 2005 11:01 pm

It's from the Simpsons, the episode Homer went to become an Astronaut. They had an antfarm up there which broke free. Kent Brockman saw an enlarged view of an ant and assumed it was an alien invasion, and said "...And I for one welcome our new Alien Overlords, and remind them of what use a talented TV personality can have in their new world order."

LibriumArcana.Games

Favorite quotations

#51

#52

#53

#54

#55

#56

#57

#58

#59

#60

#61

#62

#63

#64

#65

#66

#67

#68

#69

#70

#71

#72

#73

#74

#75