LibriumArcana.Games

Let it begin, remembering the premise from the OOC thread.

"I can't believe you'd kill me!" Adam cries as he puts down a stack of papers.

"I needed a tragic ending," the Lady responds, twirlling a pen in her fingers.

"This is sooo inaccurate though. You wrote me as if I like you!".

"Well, I had to stretch the truth to make for a better story."

"I liked the name of the destroyer of doom though."

"It actually has a really nice ring to it."

"Yeah, and it certainly made me think of tragedy too. Not as tragic as that shitty "Round and Round" song by Ratt, but tragic enough." he says with a smile.

"Out on the streets, that's where we'll meet..." the Lady sings.

"I've had enough, we've had enough." Adam says.

"I knew right from the beginning, that you would end up winning." she continues.

"I knew right from the start, you'd put an arrow through my heart..." Adam timidly finished.

"Seriously, that is enough. Gawd that song blows. It makes me want to become a Nei." she stops it.

"You mean be ripped off by Square?"

"You can't honestly believe that. They both died! Omigosh the plagarism is overflowing! There must have been an accident at Poopatrol!" she mocks.

"SPOILER ALERT WTF" Adam yells at her.

"Like you haven't played it. Come on, what do they have in common? Let's see, both are female leads, both killed by an enemy on screen... am I missing something?"

"You know I'm just screwing with ya anyway. I know this. Though, I must say I found Aeris' death much more tragic than Nei's."

"Well, Seven had more resources to deliver the story. Superior graphics, more time to develop her, more memory on the media to use for the story." she reasons.

"Better music. Uematsu is a god among musicians, and that is one of his best works."

"Oh, absolutely, and the way it is played in the FMV was pure artistic brilliance."

"And Aeris is a hawttie."

"Attractive people's deaths are always more important than regular people," she sarcastically retorts.

"Well, yeah, don't you ever watch the free press?!" he says in a silly tone.

"More like freedom of the bullshit."

"Yeah. Reminds me of a Mike Wong quote: 'Why should the truth make waves unless we are swimming in a sea of bullshit?'"

"Good quote. That reminds me, wanna post my fanfic on LA for me?"

"Why not just post it yourself? Hell, I'll activate your account myself, and we can use the subspace relay to establish a decent latency connection back to the Internet on Earth from here."

"And have to deal with your spam in Testing? I think not."

"Have it your way. Yeah, I'll post it."

"I have a great idea though, don't post it in Fanfics, post it in TKT. Hijack someone's TGOD with it or something."

"Will do. Jon just posted one where he goes on a killing spree that looks perfect."

"Sweet." she says.

There is a moment of silence, then Adam's eyes dart back and forth for a few seconds before he suddenly yells "STAHCRAF!"

"STAHCRAF!" the Lady yells back and they both sit at computers across from each other.

"The real WTF is we're using Linux playing Blizzard games and we are like aliens in another galaxy." Adam says.

"I know, like that is so wtf. Almost as wtf as us watching Star Trek. Hurry up and make."

"Ok, I made. 1v1 blood bath."

On Adam's screen, he sees the text "DestructionGHEYtor has joined the game."

"Nice name," he says to her.

"Thanks, I made it myself," she responds, while at the same time, typing "go go go go go" on the computer.

"zomg," Adam says aloud, "I'm zorg what are you," while clicking on his Command Center to make a SCV.

"Did you just say 'zomg' out loud?"

"What's it to ya, so like what are you? I need to know so I can have my strats!"

"DestructionGHEYtor: GG NOOBLAR" appears on his screen.

"laal i'll poon you" he says aloud.

"Did you just say 'lol' out loud?" she asks him.

"Like, so did you! Like just now!" he adds in a childish voice.

"And did you also just say 'pwn' out loud?"

"Double-you-tee-eff h four x," He exclaims as a Protoss Zealot starts killing his SCVs,

"I'm in ur base killing ur dudes! Just alt-f4, nublet." she says, being careful to pronounce "your" without the 'y' sound.

"WTF PRATALL HAX" he quickly types in.

"DestructionGHEYtor: pwnt" is her response on his screen.

"Seriously, you like haxxed me with your silly talk," he whines.

"You should have paid attention to multiple things at once. And you call yourself a superior life form!"

"kay kay, fine I'll remake" he again says aloud.

"kay. Gotta be a quicky though, don't forget we have the opening to go to, and I've that ID debate."

"aye. but p-l-s don't pwn me this time ms awesome" he says in all lowercase. Aloud. However that works.

"You're such a loser."


And they begin playing another round.

"So, the ID debate you have: same old same old?" he asks here while starting to control the game.

"Oh probably, but I still expect it to be interesting. The guy is well qualified; he holds a Ph. D. in evolutionary biology from ASU Koreallia, class of AW 3982." she answers while her fingers work hotkeys.

"Know if he has ancient history or temporal mechanics qualifications though?"

"Nah, he doesn't."

"That's the thing with-"

"ACK," she cuts him off.

"Yeah, you know."

"Still, it really does have some merit. It might be worth doing some serious heavy studies into it."

"We could always take a gander, starting either at Algo, but I really don't think we'd find much that we don't all ready know, not without going back in time at least."

"Yeah, depends on if he has anything to add. If it is good, I think that trip would be fascinating; heck, if nothing else, we might learn something new about the ancients."

"That's a good point," he agrees while his fingers start to fly over the hotkeys, "ZORG" he exclaims.

"Heh" she says while quickly pressing 1 a left click, 2 a left click, 3 a left click, and so on.

About ninety Zerg hydralisks are rushing his defense line, being ripped to shreads by a line of Siege tanks and marines, but they never stop coming. He sees a couple of lurkers burrow while Zerglings draw the file of the tanks. He quickly hits 0 s left click 1 right click and his tanks blast the Lurkers to hell before they can unleash their attack.

The Marines eat the 'lings before most of them can even approach, but the others keep on coming. Then the tank line collapses, and the hydras start smashing supply depots.

"Son of a bitch!" Adam cries.

"You know what they say: n00blars get pwned," she says while the remaining hydras finish off his buildings.

"gg though." he consoles himself.

"gg. Now, we have that dedication in just a little over seventy minutes; we should be getting ready."

"Aye." he agrees while issuing the shutdown command to the computers.


They put on their dress uniforms and walk out heading toward the spaceport to get to the Guardian War memorial, a newly finished structure to remember the nearly 100,000,000,000 lost in the unrestrained planetary attacks of the Guardians. Within the hour, they arrive at the memorial location, and while there were quite a few people present, the atmosphere was eerily silent.

The time comes, and they walk, carring a flag to the pole in the middle, no one saying a word. Upon reaching the pole, the Lord and Lady unfold the flag, and slowly begin to raise it. The moment it begun to rise, the military band broke the eerie silence by playing the A'millian National Anthem.

Half way up the pole, they stop raising it, coinciding with a slower part of the Anthem. The flag now stood level with eleven stone globes above the wall below, each representing one of the eleven planets annihalated by the Guardians. The flag remained level until the Anthem reached the part where the percussion picked back up, and the Lord continued raising it, with the Flag reaching the top of the pole right as the band finishes.

After another minute of complete silence, they simply walk away, not saying a word.

"Bugger," the battleship's computer cursed. "That's not right, the fucking biggest gun should be at the front of my chassis!"

"Sorry about that," the construction drone replied, "it'll only take an hour to fix!"

"Well we haven't got an hour, we could be attacked any minute and we need me out there for defence!" the battleship's computer whined.

The construction drone would have glared at the computer core had it been created with facial expressions. "Well you're just going to have to deal with it until we're finished."

"And how am I supposed to pass the time."

"Think of what you'll name yourself, try More Paranoid Than is Good For Him," the drone continued working.

"Oh just shut up!"

Somewhere in Goa'uld Space

The fight against the mysterious race known only as the Guardians had taken its toll on the Goa'uld. Whereas Ra had been able to reclaim a significant of the galaxy before the war, he now had a mere handfull of systems under his control. The reclaimed glory of the Supreme System Lord was now but a tattered memory.

Staring out a large viewport in his ship, a customized and luxurious Correlian-built courier, Ra understood perfectly that the old way of doing things was dead. He was dressed in the attire of an affluent Coruscanti businessman, not the exquisite robes and mask of a self-proclaimed "god". Ra quietly smirked to himself however, knowing that he had struck up quite the fortune in the Empire's postwar rebuilding efforts. If he could not be a baron over worlds, he was more than content to be a baron of business. As he reflected the starscape beyond, the Goa'uld noticed the reflection of a figure dressed in blacks and grays appear on the window.

"How long until we reach Tais II, Madar?" Ra asked emotionlessly.

"Just over an hour," the feminine figure replied. "Right on schedule."

"Good," sighed the Goa'uld. Ra then turned around and faced Madar, who was accompanied by two Kull Warriors standing motionless by the far door. She had short black hair, and was probably in her early thirties. She was quite the cute one, even if her attitude was so dark. Madar was Ra's personal bodyguard, and also served as a spy when the need called. It was a position the Goa'uld paid her very well for.

From the blank expression on Madar's face, Ra expected her to say something else, but the Dark Jedi remained silent. Paying the look no further mind, Ra walked on, out into one of the ship's corridors. Madar and the two Kulls followed him automatically.

"This business with the Imperial Trade Commission is surely taxing," Ra seethed. "They seek to put the entire universe out of business, it seems. It's as if the new Supreme Chancellor has lost her mind. That contract with Alizade and Gulnar was the last straw."

Madar restrained a chuckle, smiling to herself. She only followed on, doing as she was told. Though it was amusing to hear her employer complain from day to day.

"Perhaps it isn't the Supreme Chancellor," another voice added in.

Ra shot his look aside, to see a dark-skinned man walk up from another corridor. He was Ra's main business advisor, and stockbroker. Ra quipped, "Then who do you think it is?"

"I wouldn't know, only that Chancellor Saan has traditionally been rather friendly to galactic business interests on a whole, rather than posessing favoritism to one company," came the man's answer.

"Bah, she was on A&G's Board of Directors!" Ra hissed. "Don't kid yourself."

"That was also twenty years ago, and A&G is now owned by her greatest rival from those days," the man responded.

"Good point," Ra muttered. "For now, I just need to make sure this... shipment goes as planned. Dear Madar here has been ensuring that we aren't being followed or otherwise tracked, and I have three Ha'taks in the area on alert."

Walking onto the courier ship's small bridge, the ship's captain, a Jaffa by the name of Nakhtmin, greeted Ra with a nod. The Goa'uld had clearly lowered the level of formality amongst his ranks since the war, mainly due to him being too busy to care.

"If I may say so, m'lord," Nakhtmin stated, "the level of security for this mission is... unusual. Rarely would we see so many troops aboard, let alone the commander of your personal security force... or yourself. Tais II is already your most secret military installation, so armed escort is generally not needed."

"Perhaps so," Ra answered. "But this is too important to take any risks. You don't know precisely what the hell you're supposed to be hauling, Captain, but rest assured, I don't want any of the Imps' spies finding out what I'm up to."

"A wise precaution as always, m'lord," nodded Nakhtmin.

"A necessary precaution," interjected Madar.

"It took me far too long to find this thing, and far too long to get this far with my plan," Ra said, talking mostly to himself. "I will not allow any complications to stop me now. As you were, Captain. Maintain your course and speed."

System XVII, knwo to the locals as Dellious Prime

The forces of Lord Detritus and his Human allies have recently re-discovered this planet after a long lasting Warp storm finally ended, after an intense psychic fluctuation had finally peirced it, the TI forces are now investigating the reason behind this disturbence

There is something most annoying about being in this system

'Yes my lord? what do you mean?'

I mean, that the continuous rain of Methane drops. It makes me and my forces smell like a gaint fart.

'Considering the conditions the people of this planet have lived in for nigh on 3000 hundred years, I doubt they notice

anymore'

Detritus just looked at his human Aide, Jackson Merrico, who had been in his service for just over two years now

Jackson, the fact is, this little mudhole has somehow managed to disrupt a storm that for all intents and purposes has been active for nigh on ten millenia, these things just dont vanish in a millisecound

'Have you any ideas how it happened?'

No, not yet, there is definitly something here, you can almost taste it in the air, if you tune your brain into the right wavelenght

Jackson cocked an eyebrow at this 'You do know that some people around here dont have your powers, right?'

Detritus just sniggered, and continued to look out of the speeder, looking for anything intresting, in the distance, the main camp of his forces was coming into view through the thick smelly methane fog.

Once I get to back to base, remind me to contact Flotsam, we will need to launch a system wide search if we continue to find nothing here

'Aye Sir, I'll get the comm crew to do it as soon as we pull up'

As the speeder pulled in to the main defencive ring of the base, two dozen soldiers of various speices decloaked at the gate, forcing the speeder to lurch to a hat, and the occupants to slam into the dashboard

'Sonova!-'

They are merely doing their job, Jackson

'Yeah, right...'

A troll an two humans approached the speeder, Pulse lances raised.

'Identify yourselves!, this is a restricted area under military control'

I am well aware of that, Captain Trebdor

The large troll looked at his leader and snapped to attentio, giving a crisp salute

'Sir! We wernt expecting you back for hours!

I know, howver our search was a fruitless, so we have returned early, Please infrom the comm team to contact Commander Flotsam for me

'Yes Sir! At once sir!

With that, the energy field sorrounding the gate faded, letting in the speeder.

Jackson was clearly amused ' I thought I was meant to contact Flotsam?'

You were indeed, until I rememberd that Flotsam will be asleep at this time, and we all know what he's like when he get's randomly woken up...

Although she could control every minion and communicate with them telepathically, Kerrigan still found it comforting to speak with those she commanded on occasion. Perhaps her humanity just hadn't been buried deeply enough when she was engulfed into the Hive, but she didn't feel that completely severing all ties to her past life was something she needed to do in all cases, only where it hindered her or made her weak.

She sat on a throne made out of the same hard, chitinous material that composed the shells of her creatures, curved as ribs up into sharp points fanning out around her. Before her, resting on his snake-like thorax, stood her newest creation, Namtaru. Glistening in his eyes was an intelligence that, although similar to, was in important ways different than the usual deadly cunning of his kind. Although he was still fully capable of dispensing death in copious amounts, that was not his intended purpose. Rather than mindlessly slaughtering his enemies, Namtaru had been carefully engineered to serve as an emissary to those enemies, in an effort to win their trust and provide further insight into the ways their governments and minds worked.

As such, besides the cunning intelligence he had been granted, he was also equipped with vocal chords capable of reproducing human speech. Kerrigan was testing this now. "What is your current mission, my subject?" Kerrigan asked, then leaned back. As Namtaru drew in a breath to answer, his throat structure caused the air to vibrate in an odd manner. "My mission is to travel to this battle station, the Death Star 3, and make contact with the other species that live there. Then I am to report back with information and wait for further instructions." His voice was dry and rattled, sounding like a cross between a hiss and a throaty growl. Kerrigan smiled. The Hydralisk framework had proven perfect, human enough to identify with, but still alien and menacing, the better to keep potential enemies--and allies--slightly on edge. "Very good," she said, "Now, depart, and prepare for travel." With a bow, Namtaru turned and slithered out of Kerrigan's chamber.

A short time later, an Overlord departed from Kerrigan's base and flew to a hyperspace booster ring that had been acquired by Kerrigan's agents. Wrapping its tentacles around the ring, the Overlord seemed to brace itself as the structure dragged it into the swirling miasma of hyperspace. The residents of the DSIII could hardly know what they were about to receive.

Tais II Research Base
One Hour Later

Ra stared apathetically at the strange structure before him. It was a twisting, slimey, and pitch black mass of alien flesh, wrapped around a central orb-like cage of bone, which protected a glowing, pulsing ball of energy. Several scientists nodded in approval as Jaffa removed the packaging from the gigantic mass. Four men in similar garb to Madar surrounded the creature, while Kull Warriors also stood by to blast the device into submission. Ra took no risks with the creature.

"Just what is this thing, Doctor?" Ra inquired.

"It's the very thing we've been trying to acquire for two years, m'lord," the human scientist answered. "Quite simply, it's the intact brain of a Guardian starship. Extremely intelligent, and-"

"An incredibly powerful concentration of Force energies," Madar blurted, looking at the device with a sinister grin.

"And just what we need to complete you Project Fireday," the scientist finished. "Obviously all Guardian creations had powerful psychic abilities, mainly for communications and their feared "Song" weapon, as nearly all of their biotechnology is, in fact, based on psionics. With the proper study-"

"Can it be cloned, or not?" Ra interjected. "Furthermore, Madar, I want to know if this... thing... can be controlled."

"It can indeed be cloned, once we study its genetic makeup," the scientist replied.

"And yes, m'lord, it can be controlled," replied Madar. "However, it would take constant concentration for someone like myself."

"I take it you have something else to add," Ra glared.

Madar looked surprised, as if she had no answer to give. Finally, she mustered, "Meaning?"

"Is there a technological means to use Force energy to control these brains?" Ra answered. "If it takes a Dark Jedi to control each of these blasted Guardian computers, then I'd be better off investing in a Dark Jedi army."

"Indeed you would, m'lord," Madar nodded, looking warily at him. "But I have no such knowledge of such a thing, save perhaps..."

"Perhaps what?" Ra answered, his tone becoming more level.

"I heard rumors - theories - that Sith technology, obviously Force-based, could control minds," Madar said. "But I'm no Sith."

Ra then turned away, and answered, "I know where to find one. The question is if Darth Kreshna would willingly give me access to the most greatly guarded secrets of the Sith Order; without asking me why. Failing that, Madar, I want you to infiltrate the Sith archives on Coruscant."

"What?" Madar gasped.

Ra shot his view back to the Dark Jedi, and answered, "You think you're unsuited for the task, Madar?"

"With all due respect m'lord, I'm not that powerful," Madar snapped. "We're talking the Sith. Compared to them, my knowledge and abilities in the Dark Side are a joke."

"Then you'll kindly take your paycheck and termination notice, am I correct?" Ra smirked.

Madar sneered, clearly furious with her employer. She then fumed, "I'll do it. Futility aside, I'll crawl my way into that building and get you what you need."

"After I exhaust my other alternative," Ra nodded. "But I do want you on Coruscant for my signal."

"As you will," Madar answered, bowing her head.

OOC: I asume the human allies are from the Empire, right? I guess the Empire is actually the only human nation among the others. The Goa'ulds aren't human despite the fact they take human host, while the A'millans are, well, A'millans.

Dartzap wrote:System XVII, knwo to the locals as Dellious Prime

The forces of Lord Detritus and his Human allies have recently re-discovered this planet after a long lasting Warp storm finally ended, after an intense psychic fluctuation had finally peirced it, the TI forces are now investigating the reason behind this disturbence

.....................................................................

Jackson was clearly amused ' I thought I was meant to contact Flotsam?'

You were indeed, until I rememberd that Flotsam will be asleep at this time, and we all know what he's like when he get's randomly woken up...

Meanwhile, Darth Kreshna was also receiving a pleriminary report of the mission. Intriguing, he thought. Lord Detritus had 'borrowed' some squads of Stormtroopers to join his forces in investigating a newly re-discovered planet.

Jackson Merrico, on the other hand, is an Imperial expatriate, serving as an aide for Lord Detritus. The Trollish Imperium and the Galactic Empire had signed an open economy agreement between two nations (like AFTA and APEC in 20th century Earth), and Merrico was merely one of the results; last week Sandra Kuat told Kreshna that she was considering to open a KDY Shipyard in the Trollish Imperium due to lower taxes.

Little did the Sith realized the future importance of Detritus' discovery as his secretary spoke through the comm. unit.

"Darth Kreshna? Lord Ba'al has invited you for lunch today, remember?"

"Sigh.. I mean, splendid. How can I forget? What's the name of the place again? Vienetta... Vinata...."

"Viennese Poulard, Sir."

Darth Kreshna sighed. The Goa'uld System Lord Ra had been investing heavily in Coruscant -in private capacity, of course. But while the System Lord was not around, his rival Lord Ba'al had been aboard the Death Star since one week ago, trying to curry Imperial's favor. Viennese Poulard was probably the most expensive restaurant aboard the Death Star, and Kreshna knew that Ba'al was 'courting' him. Kreshna actually felt annoyed, but rejecting such invitation was a diplomatic no-no.

After leaving the office, he entered the limo and spoke to the chauffeur, "Viennese Poulard."

Back aboard his courier, Ra adjusted his business suit nonchalantly as the craft took off, leaving Tais II behind for the moment. Out the window, he noticed a small shuttle also taking off, quickly arcing away as Madar departed for Coruscant.

"Captain, take us to the DS III, maximum hyperdrive speed," the Goa'uld commanded.

Ra then frowned, cursing himself for not thinking of how he was going to control the Guardian device in the first place. It now lied dormant in his lab, sedated by powerful drugs. The Guardian core was not the only thing in his lab - far from it, in fact; he had biolasers, bioarmor, and many other Guardian artefacts being experimented on within the base. But the Guardian mind was the key to his most important project, and Ra wouldn't let anything stand in his way.

He understood the risks; he had to get some clue of how to control the device, lest it reassert itself and attack its new master. Like a businessman however, Ra wanted to skirt Imperial law, but not break it outright. He would not call upon Madar unless it was his final option. The cute yet cunning Dark Jedi had been right about the risks; she mainly performed acts of corporate espionage, spying against his rivals in the Imperial business world. She was unparelleled in that role. But infliltrating the Sith Archives was a whole different game, and one that could get Ra, his corporation, and his state, in great trouble with the Empire. It would also mean Madar's death, barring some miracle.

No, the risk was too great. Ra's hand lingered over the intercom button on his leather chair, his finger itching to push it.

"She's only going to Coruscant to remain on standby," he thought to himself. "Last resort."

Ra then leaned back in his chair, and sighed. He would have to put on his poker face, and be in best form. This request of his had to work. It had to. He would not allow it to be otherwise.

The courier would arrive at DS III in a matter of minutes.

Viennese Poulard Bistro, aboard the Death Star Three....

Even though Lord Ba'al was alone, Darth Kreshna knew that his bodyguards are spreaded around the bistro. He did not need Phoenix telepathy to be aware of that fact; there were two rough-looking Jaffas who was reading newspaper on the next table.

The Goa'uld greeted him.



"Ah, so this is the famous Darth Kreshna. It is a pleasure that we eventually meet each other."

The two men shook hands. "Mine too," Darth Kreshna lied. If this is about the naquada installation again.....

Despite his stern face, Lord Ba'al seemed to indulge himself in pleasantries, "I can assure you, Darth Kreshna, that this place is best known for its Blanquette de veau, or probably you'd prefer Steak au poivre with Cabernet Sauvignon?"

"I think I would like Calamari accompanied with Chardonnay , thank you."

"Ah, splendid choice." Ba'al snapped his fingers and a waiter arrived. He also ordered Pastis for apéritif. "You should try this," he said.

As they were enjoying the crudités, Lord Ba'al opened the conversation, "I do understand the Galactic Empire's stance on my naquada powerplant...."

So this IS about the motherfucking naquada installation. Darth Kreshna frowned, and answered, "and speaking for my country, I'd say that the stance is unchanged. Not to mention that Supreme System Lord Ra may take it as aggression should you insist to carry on with your plans."

Ba'al smiled cynically, "'The Supreme System Lord Ra'; too bad he still fails to see the reality that his nation is not the only sovereign Goa'uld nations among the stars, doesn't he? And I dare to say it is unfortunate that your government seems to suffer from the same lack of perspective."

"The Empire merely wish peace and stability upon the region, Lord Ba'al. Ra shares the same views with the Empire, and so are other members of the Security Counsel. Your naquada program, on the other hand, is somewhat contradictive to our peace-keeping effort. While I don't speak for other nations, I believe that the Trollish Imperium and the A'millan Star Empire are not in favor of your plans either."

"Ah," Ba'al nodded understandingly, "but not to undermine the nations you mentioned, of course, I believe that the Empire is the most influential nation considering its size, technology, and power. I even dare to say that you outclass them in term of technology alone," he said flatteringly.

"However," he continued, "I'm afraid I have to say that the Empire has been unfair to the Goa'uld nations in general; Ra's government is not the only nation acknowledged by the Goa'uld people, and yet the Empire only acknowledges his."

Darth Kreshna was somewhat offended as his voice became stern, "with all respect, Lord Ba'al, I believe I don't need to quote the entire Guardian War history while we are having lunch."

"Of course," Ba'al said, "but let's have a hypothetical scenario; let's say that the Empire acknowledge my government instead of Ra's. Do you really think that the A'millans, or the Trolls, are in position to go against your policy?"

"I am not so inclined to discuss hypothetical scenarios, Lord Ba'al. Besides, the Empire has great interest in peace, not domination."

"And believe or not, so do we. We just want to be left alone with our naquada program, Darth Kreshna. Could you understand our concern?"

"A program that is unfortunately contradictive with our goal to keep peace and stability on the region."

"And how a naquada power plant can lead to arms race?"

Power plant my hairy ass, Darth Kreshna thought. He was getting tired with Ba'al playing the 'oppressed innocent' game. Probe Droids and Hyperspace Spy Satelite had shown that Ba'al installation had the capability to build naquada-based weapons. Of course, he could not mention it during the conversation. He felt really tired; Ba'al was a mass-murdering maniac who did not hesitate to kill his own people if he needed to, and letting this maniacal despot to build naquada weapons is making as much sense as throwing a lit match to a can of gasoline.

The Sith Inquisitor considered his options....




OOC: Alright, Jon. I'm trying to make "Ra vs Ba'al" is like "PRC vs Taiwan", while the Galactic Empire is like the United States. Imagine how PRC (Ra) would react if Taiwan (Ba'al) starts building ICBM. Of course, in this story, the Empire (at least Darth Kreshna) is with Ra's side. I don't know the policy of the new governments, though. Whaddya' think, Allen?

The Imperium Embassy aboard the DSIII

Captain Igneous was the officer currently in charge of maintaining the embassy on Lord Kreshnas space station whilst his own commander was away doing the various tasks that were needed in the re-commissioning of various Warships at anchor in L-space, which had been there since the end of the last major war.

His current occupation was to observe the meeting between Lord Kreshna and Baal, via a numbers of cameras and microphones. It was a well known fact that everyone and anyone spied on each other here, so no questions would be ever asked.

Ba'al smiled cynically, "'The Supreme System Lord Ra'; too bad he still fails to see the reality that his nation is not the only sovereign Goa'uld nations among the stars, doesn't he? And I dare to say it is unfortunate that your government seems to suffer from the same lack of perspective."

"The Empire merely wish peace and stability upon the region, Lord Ba'al. Ra shares the same views with the Empire, and so are other members of the Security Counsel. Your naquada program, on the other hand, is somewhat contradictive to our peace-keeping effort. While I don't speak for other nations, I believe that the Trollish Imperium and the A'millan Star Empire are not in favor of your plans either."

"Ah," Ba'al nodded understandingly, "but not to undermine the nations you mentioned, of course, I believe that the Empire is the most influential nation considering its size, technology, and power. I even dare to say that you outclass them in term of technology alone," he said flatteringly.

‘…well well well, looks like Ra isn’t as in charge as he likes to think, this Baal bloke seems to be grabbing at straws though.. Kreshnas ego has already been fed today, and not in ways that Baal would want to volunteer to do… And if he really wants a demonstration of our tech, well, I can easily transmit him into the Maw, though there’s not much room there these days… ‘

‘I’d not suggest it, igneous….’

Igneous spun around on his chair, to see who has spoken ‘Ah, commander, sir, I wasn’t expecting you back for a while, I’d heard Eisen and Shrapnel were still barely ready to leave the void…’

Jetsam grinned at his junior officer ‘you clearly heard wrong. How’s the meeting going?’

‘Oh Kreshnas keeping him running, there’s not much chance Baal will get any endorsement for his plant from here, I’d say’

‘Good, if Baal looks lik he’s going to cause trouble tell me and I’ll go and lend my voice, see if he’s as whily as he likes to think he is’

‘Aye commander’

'I hear that our lord is currently upping stciks from the mud hole, Heared anything on the grapevine about their next destination?'

No sir, last I heared Commander Flotsam was getting the fleet ready to transmat back to the base, all scans and searches on the system have failed to find anything, both from space and via the landing parties.'

'Well, thats just damn strange, keep me informed okay? If theres any action, I want in'

'Aye Sir'

Aboard the Death Star...

Back in his limousine, Darth Kreshna massaged his face. Very tired. He actually had expected it; Lord Ba'al would build the naquada installation anyway, and it could mean another war between Ra and Ba'al.

The region needed stability for sure; he had signed many trade agreements with Ra, and many G.E. corporations like Kuat Drive Yards and Xizor Transit Systems had actually operated within the Goa'uld nation. There had been many things being put on stake now.

Well, he had indeed tried to diplomatically intimidate Ba'al, as well as threating embargo if the System Lord insisted to carry on with his plan, but Lord Ba'al was as stuborn as a mule. While Ra's territory had shrinked as the result of the Guardian War, Ba'al was actually getting stronger; having Anubis' territory and forces in his hand.

Darth Kreshna believed that Ra could not stand alone against Ba'al if a war broke, so the Empire needed to lend his hand. However, considering the recent Imperial isolationist policy.... Ba'al knew that the Empire probably wouldn't help. That damn despot played his cards right, waiting for the result of the election before carrying his plan.

Probably if the A'millans and the Trollish decided to show their support on Ra, Ba'al would think twice, especially if the two nations also joined the embargo. The Sith suddenly remembered about the report he received on Trollish-Imperial joint forces on the newly discovered planet. Hmmm.... maybe I'll try the Trolls first

"The Trollish Embassy," he told the chauffeur.


Little did Darth Kreshna know that there would be something that was probably a much greater threat than Ba'al.....

DS III

Ra stormed through the wide corridors of the immense battle station, walking right up to the section Darth Kreshna's private quarters were. An Imperial officer noticed him immeditately.

"I need to see Darth Kreshna," Ra stated blandly.

"My apologies, sir, but he just left for the Trollish embassy," she replied.

"The fuck?" Ra muttered. "That's just my luck."

"Lady Luck despises you, Ra," Baal chuckled. "You should have known that the day the Tauri came to your little backwater planet and detonated a nuke in your face."

"Good to see you too, Baal," Ra huffed.

"Yes, a pleasure as always," Baal smirked. "What brings you here?"

"I would ask you the same thing," Ra chuckled.

"Oh, I'm merely trying to gain the upper hand over you, as per usual," Baal stated.

"Old news," Ra said, waving his hand in dismissal. "Still pissed off at the Imps?"

"Yes, because unlike you, I haven't become such a... personality within the Empire. Most of my efforts were spent on getting in the good graces of the Tauri, and other races," explained Baal.

"Well, it looks to me like you have another reason to be pissed," Ra stated.

"Yes," Baal answered. "Your dear Darth Kreshna has become quite the damned diplomat in his postwar years, claiming I'm a threat to peace because of my... projects. If he keeps it up, he'll have all of the old Alliance against me. You're quite the thorn in my side, Lord."

"I'm sorry you feel that way," Ra quipped.

The two Goa'uld glared at each other for a moment. Baal finally snapped, "I take it you're not the benevolent knight in shining armor you would have the galaxies believe. You have a dirty secret of your own."

"Galadriel was the knight in shining armor," Ra laughed. "I never was."

"Bah, she had you hook line and sinker," Baal chuckled. "Don't take me as a fool."

"I call you many negative things, but 'fool' isn't one of them," Ra smirked. "Suffice it to say that I'm not playing the zealot here because my own dealings would put me in the same position as you, good Baal. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to catch Darth Kreshna before he gets too far away."

"If I were you, I'd just wait for him to return," Baal intoned. "I'll be in my stateroom."

Ra nodded, and dumped a massive amount of Imperial credits on the officer's desk, saying, "You never heard a thing."

"Heard what, sir?" she asked with an innocent look.

"That's a good girl," Ra smiled, kissing her on the cheek. At that, he walked off, to the DS III lounge. He hated to wait, but he was a Goa'uld; they knew patience as a matter of course.

'Commander, Lord Kreshna seeks an audience with Ambassador Dright, seems like he was in a bit of a mood as well’

‘What do you expect after being with the Prince of Smarmy for an hour?, I’ll inform the Ambassador of it, I’m sure he’ll be fine with it. Try and get a few luxuries out, might as well attempt to show we’re not the slows we all know we are..’

‘Aye sir’

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ambassador Dright was not infact a troll, he was a citizen of the Kronus Star Triumvirate, and thus human. He’d become ambassador to the DSIII after having fighting particular nasty paper and red tape war with several fierce paper pushers within the Empire and various Goa’uld lords in the last year or so.

This was his reward, rich beyond belief, food that would make the most pompous moff’s arteries clog in terror and some of the finest bodyguards you could imagine.

The door buzzer to his quarters rang.

‘Enter.., Ah, commander, how can I be of assistance?’

Jetsam bowed his large head in respect’

‘Sir, Lord Kreshna has contacted us seeking an audience with you, It would seem he wishes to discuss various matters’

‘Such as?’

‘Lord Detritus’s joint mission to the warp interference and his recent meeting with lord Ba’al of the Goa’uld, which did seem to get somewhat heated on one persons part, in the usual diplomatic way, those are the most pressing matters as far as we know’

‘Very well, I shall be most pleased to see him, I haven’t had many visitors since I took this position, Can I have all the details of the various topics you think we shall be talking about? I might as well look like I’m kept in the loop’

Jetsam grinned, this human had the true sense of humour that you got with being near Trolls for prolonged periods of time

‘Of course my lord, as soon as Lord Kreshna arrives, I shall direct him to the main meeting hall’

‘Thank you’

Later that same day, they once again put on the dress uniforms and get on a ship, this time heading for the A'millian State University campus on Koreallia where an Intelligent Design debate is taking place.

They arrive in the university's large auditorium a bit early, before most the audience and before their opponent. Seeing how they had some time to waste, they decided to screw around for a bit. Going backstage, they found a violin and a harp among the school's band equipment and brought them out on stage.

The audience members who also arrived early went silent at the bizarre sight of their nation's leaders randomly picking up instruments on stage before the debate. The Lord and Lady look at them, then look at each other, and say "what the hell, let's do it."

The Lady speaks, addressing the crowd "The war between the East and West grew fiercer by the day. On the battleground during a furious skirmish, the soldier Draco of the West thinks of Maria, whom he left in his homeland...."

They play as much of the approiate songs as they can on the two instruments, and Adam steps up to sing

"O Maria,"
"Oh Maria,"
"Is my voice reaching"
"Where you are?"

Then, Adam goes to continue the narration:

"The West was defeated, and Maria's castle came under Eastern control. Maria, forced into marriage by
the Eastern Prince Ralse, does not abandon her feelings for Draco, but thinks of her lover each night as she watches the skies..."

She takes centre stage again, with Adam playing the harp, and begins to sing.

"Oh my hero, so far away now.
Will I ever see your smile?
Love goes away, like night into day,
it's just a fading dream."

She starts playing the violin while still singing.

"In the darkness, you're the stars.
Our love outshines the sun.
For eternity, for me there can be
Only you my chosen one"

"Must I forget you? Our solemn promise?
Will autumn replace spring?
What shall I do? I'm lost without you.
Speak to me once more..."

Adam walks to her and says "Come, Maria, dance with me."

They step around in a circle , while still playing the instruments, then Adam returns to the side, with the Lady again in the centre alone, singing.

"We must part now, my life goes on.
But my heart won't give you up.
Ere I walk away, let me hear you say,
I meant as much to you."

"So gently, you touched my heart.
I will be forever yours.
Come what may, I won't age a day.
I'll wait for you always..."

They finish the song, and someone from the small audience, who has obviously played Final Fantasy 6 before, starts crawling up to the stage, manically saying "I'll squish you."

"Prepare to die, Ultros!" Adam yells, laughing, and draws his cerimonial sword, put quickly puts it back when a man steps out on stage.

The human, about fifty years of age wearing a business suit, walks up to them and says "I've never heard of you guys ever singing in public before."

"The stage was just begging for it," Adam responds while the Lady put the instruments back where they found them.

"You really aren't to bad!" the human laughs.

"Indeed. Well, you, of course, know us."

"Ah yes, I am Doctor Gary Peterson." he says with a slight bow.

"We're looking forward to your presentation, doctor." The lady tells him.

"If you'll have a seat up here, we can begin shortly. The audience is starting to fill out all ready."

"Very good" they say, all three taking their seats.

The audience started to come in, hundreds, then a thousand, and more. Under the desk, Lord Adam's leg started to shake and he started swallowing hardly very often. He repositions his foot, setting it flat on the floor, then begins twiddling his thumbs.

"You'd think you would just get over it after all this time," the Lady communicates to him telepathically.

"I wish we could just get damn started all ready," he responds telepathically, noting his pulse increasing proportional to the number of attendants.

"Aye. Almost time."

He looks down at his watch. Two minutes until the scheduled start. He contemplated putting a 'suggestion' in Doctor Peterson's mind to get started early, but again got distracted by his leg again trembling.

"Why can't this be like TV or radio? God damn." he complains to her mind.

"It really is no different, if you think about it rationally."

"Pity this bullshit isn't rational. If it was, I'd have crushed it by now. Bloody hell, how damn much longer!?" He checks is watch again. Ninety seconds left. "Sometimes I think knowing what time is worse than not knowing, fuck me, it beats randomness, what am I blabbering about?"

"Integrate from x equals zero to pi over two one half cosine squared of x by tangent to the second x dx." she suggests to shut him up.

"Hmm, antiderivative of cosine squared x by tangent squared x div two dx, is cosine squared x by sine squared x over two cosine squared x, cos over cos is unity, pull the one half out front, leaving sine squared x dx requiring integration by parts so uv duv; u v minus the integral of v du, u is sine x, du is sine x dx, dv is cosine x dx, and v is negative cosine x. Yielding negative sine x by cosine x minus the integral of negative cosine x by sine x dx. Pull the negative out front and we nest one, u is cosine x, du is negative sine x, dv is cosine x dx, v is negative sine x, so all together we have negative sine x by cosine x plus cosine x by negative sine x minus the integral of sine squared x dx, right back where we started, so time to apply algebra, and the integral to both sides, divide the two from both sides, giving us the integral of sine squared x dx equals negative sine x by cosine x plus cosine x by negative sine x all over two. Remembering the one half we brought to the outside early one makes it all over four, and we have our antiderivative, so let's apply the first fundamental thoerum of calculus to get the definite integral; since the lower value is zero, and sine of zero is zero, the identity property means we don't care about the right side, so applying some simplifying algebra leaves our answer to become negative one half cosine of pi over two times sine of pi over two, and sine of pi over two is zero.

"Wait a minute, sine squared of x is greater than zero for all values of x such that x is in the set of all real numbers, and therefore the definite integral from a to b when b is greater than a should be positive, by the definition of the definite integral. What the fuck did I do wrong?"


Lord Adam now sat still, but pensive: calmed down by the mathematics, but looking for his mistake off in his head as the presentation began.


"Welcome, everybody. I am Doctor Gary Peterson, and thank you for attending todays talk. Those of you in my class, be sure to sign in to receive extra credit."

"Well, I definitaly got the initial algebra right..."

"Today, I will be discussing the possibility of intelligent design of the A'millian genus, and have two special guests: two of the remaining members of this genus."

The Lord and Lady stand for the audience, then sit back down.

"Oh, fluh! Positive sine in the fourth nested integral! How could I be so foolish? Ok, let's see, with that positive, it will cancel in the algebraic manipulation, so that is a dead end. Of course, use the fact that cosine squared x equals one minus sine squared x! So at second nest..." Adam continues thinking about his error as he stands.

"First," Dr Peterson continues, "I'd like to quickly overview two concepts: speciation and biological evolution. Speciation is the process by which a new species emerges, and two organisms are said to be a different species when they do not naturally breed to create reproductively viable offspring. They may be physically, chemically, or behaviourally incompatible and be considered other species."

"All right, negative sine x by cosine x plus the integral of one minus the integral of sine squared dx. Much better; integral of one is x (+C) add sine squared, div both sides by two again, which obviously gives one fourth x minus cosine x by sine x. And now, for the first fundamental theorum; still second side is naught minus naught so leaving only left side: one fourth of pi over two minus naught since sine of pi over two is zero, thus the answer is pi over eight!"

"Took you bloody long enough," the Lady communicates telepathically.

"Evolution is the process by which life changes in a biosystem, and new species emerge as an effect. Genetic variation is present in a population. Evolution does not and need not explain how this variation got there, though it is vital for the process. On the population, there is a selection pressure of some sort, which may be many things: environmental, predation, intraspecies competition for food, water, mates, disease, many factors. Those adequatly fit to continue to breed under these pressure survive, and the remaining do not. Thus, the selection pressure guides what genetic variations are advantageous for the population."

"It was a double curve ball!"

"I know, but not that hard. You've just been slacking."

"Bleghy."

"Heh."


"Note that I have been saying population here: evolution and speciation do not occur in individuals; they are always in a population, and it is not a sudden sweeping change: a population may split with these changes, going in many ways to survive, but all having a common ancestor, and thus common characteristics. With that background, we shall see how it applies, or in my opinion, doesn't apply, to the A'millian genus."


OOC: To be continued; it is bed time. And yes, I am going somewhere with this for the plot; all will be revealed in due time.

Dartzap wrote:‘Of course my lord, as soon as Lord Kreshna arrives, I shall direct him to the main meeting hall’

‘Thank you’

In the main hall...

"....so you see, Mister Ambassador, this is the whole situation. Ba'al developing naquada installation would surely disrupt the peace and balance accross the region. I would urge the Trollish Imperium to join our embargo on Ba'al." Darth Kreshna said as he finished his story.

"Oh, by the way," the Sith suddenly remembered something, "I am actually intrigued by the recent development of our joint mission. What we have found, actually?"

The DS III Lounge

Darth Kreshna was certainly a man fond of his luxuries, and the lounge of his personal battlestation demonstrated this well. Whereas the old DS II had countless expansive mess halls where pre-packaged food rations were distributed by machine, the lounge was more like a nightclub for the entire station, complete with loud music, dancing crowds, and limitless amounts of champagne.

Ra was seated in a private room, completely soundproofed from the rest of the lounge. The Goa'uld tipped back a glass as a small device similar in shape to a coaster lit up in, shining in a soothing tone of blue.

Madar's face flickered into existance over the holographic pad, nodding in respect. She stated, "M'lord, I'm in position. I've acquired quite the nice hotel room overlooking the Archives, should your order come."

"Very good," said Ra. "I trust the transmission is secure?"

"Doubly," came her answer. "What of your own attempts?"

"There's been a delay," Ra sighed. "Darth Kreshna is not at the station. In fact, I seem to have arrived less than a minute after he left. The nerve of that man... but his power gives him lots of room to maneuver. One must tred lightly around the most powerful Force-user since Anakin Skywalker, yes?"

"Absolutely," Madar smirked. "If only I could get ahold of something as powerful as the Phoenix essence... I would have difficulty controlling it at first, but... ...I digress. I've arrived totally unsuspected, and have been planning my assault. Operatives Buscan and Nica are also in the area, ready to assist."

"Splendid. If all goes according to play, you could simply think of the whole mission as a paid vacation," Ra chuckled. "Inform me immediately if any complications arise, or anything... interesting... happens at the Imperial Center. Good hunting."

With another nod, Madar's image flickered out. Ra then pushed a button on his table, and stated, "More champagne, if you don't mind."

"At once, sir," the bartender replied.

OOC: the name of the lounge is Kubika --jointly owned by Sandra Kuat and Darth Kreshna. It plays a lot of Chill, Ambient, and other Electronica music!

========================================================

Ra wrote: "Splendid. If all goes according to play, you could simply think of the whole mission as a paid vacation," Ra chuckled. "Inform me immediately if any complications arise, or anything... interesting... happens at the Imperial Center. Good hunting."

With another nod, Madar's image flickered out. Ra then pushed a button on his table, and stated, "More champagne, if you don't mind."

"At once, sir," the bartender replied.

The Death Star is huge, and while it was already night in the region where the Kubika Lounge is located, it was still sunset in the region where the Trollish Embassy resided.

Ra should have recognized the bikini-clad Twi-lekkian waitress who entered his private chamber, as the Goa'uld --as well as other jetsets like Alexander Xizor, Baron Silas Tagge, or Sandra Kuat-- was quite a regular in Kubika Lounge. Who was her name again?

Winter Pagent performed by Aromabar played ambiently in the background as the waitress greeted him rather seductively, "Lord Ra, nice to see you again."

As she poured the champagne for Ra, she wishpered on his ear, "Ba'al is on this station too."

"Yes, I saw the bastard earlier," Ra smirked. "Looks like he's up to his same old tricks."

Ra waited for the waitress to finish pouring his glass, and then motioned to the seat beside him, and said, "Why don't you have a seat, dear?"

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:

Dartzap wrote:‘Of course my lord, as soon as Lord Kreshna arrives, I shall direct him to the main meeting hall’

‘Thank you’

In the main hall...

"....so you see, Mister Ambassador, this is the whole situation. Ba'al developing naquada installation would surely disrupt the peace and balance accross the region. I would urge the Trollish Imperium to join our embargo on Ba'al." Darth Kreshna said as he finished his story.

"Oh, by the way," the Sith suddenly remembered something, "I am actually intrigued by the recent development of our joint mission. What we have found, actually?"

'To be quite frank, sir, My lord was unable to find anything in that system. Lord Detritus went through various search patterns and different techniques and there was just nothing there, from what I understand he will be returning to the Astroid Belt within the next few hours, I'm sure if you wish to talk to him about it he will be more than pleased to transmat here when you have the time'

'As far as Ba'al is concerned.. from what the intelligence community is saying, whilst he is a threat, he but a small fish in a rather large bowl of such things, we shall support you with the embargo, for all the good that it may do...'

'Would you like a jelly baby?'

Ra wrote:"Yes, I saw the bastard earlier," Ra smirked. "Looks like he's up to his same old tricks."

Ra waited for the waitress to finish pouring his glass, and then motioned to the seat beside him, and said, "Why don't you have a seat, dear?"

The waitress hesitated for a bit, "I'm supposed to be working now, but... ah, why not? You're cute!"

As the waitress sat down and caressed him naughtily, Ra noticed a HUGEMOUNGOUS BULGE inside 'her' pants.

The waitress was a transvestite

Dartzap wrote:'To be quite frank, sir, My lord was unable to find anything in that system. Lord Detritus went through various search patterns and different techniques and there was just nothing there, from what I understand he will be returning to the Astroid Belt within the next few hours, I'm sure if you wish to talk to him about it he will be more than pleased to transmat here when you have the time'

"Next few hours?" Darth Kreshna trying to hide the signs of weariness on his face. It is already dark out there, and I'm supposed to be hanging around in Kubika Lounge now. Sometimes I hate this job, he thought. "I would be happy to wait for his arrival, then."

Dartzap wrote:'As far as Ba'al is concerned.. from what the intelligence community is saying, whilst he is a threat, he but a small fish in a rather large bowl of such things, we shall support you with the embargo, for all the good that it may do...'

'Would you like a jelly baby?'

"A pleasure," Darth Kreshna took one. "and allow me to express my gratitude that the Trollish Imperium would join us in this embargo."

"Oh, by the way, would you mind if I smoke?"

OOC: In case you're worried about 'oh, the Empire could detect a secretive built spy android'. I'd like to also remind you that Guri was undetectable via passive scan, and this android is of infinitely less threat, he's basically an observer.

--------------

Why was he there? Sent out as a semi-spy for the Commonwealth, to explore the goings on at this battlestation - though they shrouded themselves in secrecy, the main AIs of the Commonwealth weren't half-nosy about things that weren't any of their business. This battlestation was called the 'Death Star III', apparently, and had the power to blow up a planet. Theoretically, the Commonwealth had that ability, but they weren't interested in using it, mostly due to not wanting to cause mass destruction.

From what the bioform android could deduce, the meetings were about some sort of dispute over some System Lord vs another System Lord and his associates, rather bothersome business, really. The bioform thanked the older AIs that he was essentially immune to all but the most in-depth scanning equipment. Although this 'Galactic Empire' was more than a little stronger than the Commonwealth, and would likely win, they weren't nearly as observant or secure - easily spied upon.

He noticed one of the two 'System Lords' sat in the lounge, being chatted up by a transvestite alien waitor of a head-tentacled species that he didn't recognise, and the System Lord had noticed that fact rather much too late. Amusing, he thought, even upgraded and biologically enhanced humans are fallible. Flesh truly is a design flaw.

Narsil wrote:He noticed one of the two 'System Lords' sat in the lounge, being chatted up by a transvestite alien waitor of a head-tentacled species that he didn't recognise, and the System Lord had noticed that fact rather much too late. Amusing, he thought, even upgraded and biologically enhanced humans are fallible. Flesh truly is a design flaw.

As the android was scanning the lounge, a Stormtrooper approached him. "Papers please," the Stormtrooper said, wondering what this person was doing --standing outside the Kubika Lounge like that.

OOC: now, the Commonwealth haven't made a proper introduction to other nations, and the android here is a spy. Of course he doesn't have a visa, does he?

OOC: The Commonwealth has a master espionage organisation, do you think they haven't prepared for that? They would most definitely lose in an upright fight, but if you try to out-spy them, they will promptly recount the precise contents of what you last vomited.

----------------

The android grimaced, the Commonwealth had prepared for the eventuality of a visa, and had resorted to kidnapping someone and stealing their identity, brutal but effectove in the long run. It was quite simple to use technological methods to map the memories and experiences of a person into a computer, and creating an android duplicate was equally simple.

"Here," he said in a Coruscanti accent, holding up his identification. "I didn't know Stormtroopers had started hassling bartenders now," he remarked wryly.